Red means go

One might wonder with characters like Ms. S, that girls have immense foresight and are always looking ahead. Except that Ms. S is an exception.

Scene 1:
You are on the passenger side and a girl is driving the car (and/or your fate, actually!!). Its all good, the car is cruising at 40s, nice music. What can possibly go wrong? Wait until you see a red light. So there is this red light staring at you. There's a reason they chose red. Its blaring, can't miss it, red is danger, right? You wish. This car has no intentions of stopping, steady, still at 40, like red means go. The surprise quickly translates into a shock. You go "Hey, hey, red, red, hey you.." *car breakkkkkkkkkkks*

"Oh I was looking at that next light, it was green.. hehhehee"

Scene 2:
Shopping mall, wildlife sanctuary, ship, prison, no matter where, as long as there is a door with a sign "DO NOT USE THIS DOOR." you can bet $90,000 or more that a girl will use that door. Or try hard to if its not cooperative. Its as if they suddenly they lose their 18 years of literary ability. They can't read.

Letters or colors. They can't read. Unbelievable! We tested this on 12,211 female subjects. 12,210 subjects demonstrated the above behavior. Oh, 1 was a guy dressed as a girl.

Note: If you are a girl and I don't open the door in front of you, its only because some experiement is in progress, not that I'm not gentlemanly.

The Geller effect

I have a "Monica type" friend. Ms. S. Of course she denies it but here are a few sample activities:

1. Her movies at home are arranged in alphabetical order.
2. Her clothes are organized in the order of rainbow color shades. I'm sure she's got one of those complex looking physics lab "-scopes" to maintain accuracy.
3. Most things she buys undergo initial antibacterial, antiviral treatments before use. Yes, we are talking about new things. Manufacturing facilities these days, you never know.
4. When you visit her you most probably get a complementary supply of germ-x and a napkins.
5. Recently she is researching on how cleaning products can be cleaned.

Reminds me of F.R.I.E.N.D.S,
Monica is vacuuming the carpet. Then she uses a handy vacuum to clean the vacuum machine and goes "If only they had smaller vacuums to clean this one."

You get the idea.

Ms. S' latest classic:
"I would bring you the DVD but I already packed it.."
"Oh you found a place? Where are you moving to?"
"No, but I started packing" (D'oh!! written all over her)

Other suggestions:
You can wake up before you sleep.
You can get off work before you go to work.
Etcetera. Etcetera.

(updated)
Spotted at Ms. S's:







Yellow sticky to Ms. S read..
"Now you wanna be Ross? What's with you and the Gellers?"

Note:
One may not trust me with my bad prior history of rare, mild exaggeration of things, but I swear this is true.

The French Head Butta Game

Zidane. From starred to barred.

One of the few players the world was watching this worldcup. Some men never get enough... and get famous the infamous way. Can't believe he ended his career that way.

Anyway, it was a treat for creative gamers. Check this out!!


http://www.addictinggames.com/zidaneheadbuttgame.html

Finest in fine print

Heard on radio a few weeks ago. After a commercial when they say the fine print stuff at the end.

Like "Zamestrica PM relieves pain from your dull head in milliseconds and gives you a good night's sleep so you can continue to have your nightmares. Zamestrica PM is proven to provide fastest relief. The money you pay for Zamestrica PM will give you so much pain and grief that the original pain feels like nothing!! Ask your doctor if you can try Zamestrica PM" You should not have Zamestrica PM if you have diahoerrea, cold sore or stinky feet. Side effects include losing hearing ability, losing balance, vomitting and in some cases dieing"

This was not after a Zamestrica ad, but some ad I did not pay attention to. End of it said "Life is precious." As part of fine print message. Sometimes we forget simple things in the mundane, fast track, busy lives we lead. We get older day by day and forget to realize the preciousness of life.

That message revitalized the fact that "Life is precious" and a moment to think. Sometimes the finest thoughts come out of a fine print.

Observed absurdity

Ok, here's a pet peeve I've been petting for a while.

Scene:

A meeting at work where the conference line is open.

Seen:

Admist heavy discussion whether it would rain heavily this weekend or would it be sunny.. Oops that was going on in my mind. I waver every time we have a meeting and I can't get enough from 8 people repeating the same thing 8 times. Well, I mean I waver every time we have a meeting.

Well the actual discussion was about "should we update something in one place or update something in both places". That's not important here. When someone says something seemingly important, the caller on the conference call goes "I can't hear you, can you speak up please?" and at least one person sitting by the phone relentlessly INCREASES THE PHONE VOLUME
ON OUR END".

I just don't get it. What does the person increasing the volume think in his head??

"I can't hear you"
(Increasing the volume) "Well, we can hear you, and now we'll hear you better now."

"I can't hear you"
(Increasing the volume) "Oh here we go, pushing up the phone volume increases the vocal chord pitch of every one in this room, how cool"

"I can't hear you"
(Increasing the volume) "Too bad for you, now at least you can hear yourself louder"

"I can't hear you"
(Increasing the volume) "Oh let me do a magic"

I am not kidding, I have observed this absurdity at least 11 times by 11 different people. Common sense like they say, is so uncommon!